Good Intentions: How Your Leadership is Failing You (and How to Fix It)

How many of us know that good intentions don't always lead to success?

We have all experienced times when our intentions did not match the outcome we were seeking. Perhaps we wanted to help a staff member, but they thought we were micro-managing. Or we chose to stay quiet in a meeting to allow others to speak, but people thought we had checked out.

When leaders lead teams (no matter how big or small), or are in a position of influence, their actions speak louder than their words – and intentions.

For the majority of leaders, they don't take their position lightly. They don't abuse their power and authority, and sometimes even wonder whether they should be a leader at all. They want to ensure their actions are resulting in the desired outcomes and not making things potentially worse.

And sometimes this is where the problem lies. Some leaders are 'all-in'. They want to see their people thrive, grow and succeed. I call this the 'too much' syndrome – where a leader's passion and care for their people can actually get in the way of helping them succeed.

Being reliable – too much

These leaders are dependable. They grew up with leaders who were often unavailable or too busy to help. When a team member asks them to review something, they spend the evening combing through documents and researching answers so they can provide valuable feedback. They are ok to answer calls at 7pm during dinner, or during committed DND time.

What will happen? Apart from having a lack of personal boundaries, the challenging thing is not allowing their teams to fail. They become a safety net for others and do not allow them to problem-solve on their own. They can end up stifling creativity, drive, and initiative. Just like a parent who constantly rescues their child, their team will never develop the muscle of knowing how to do things on their own. They will create a bunch of minions who follow their ways, but the team's potential is capped.

Caring about their people – too much

Caring leaders really want to see their team succeed. They see great potential in them and desire to help them grow. They give their team challenging tasks and are with them every step of the way. They provide direction and best-practice solutions and are more than willing to offer advice on how to solve problems.

What's wrong with that? A bit too much of this can often result in an appearance of micro-management and needing staff to solve issues in the same way the leader has done. Staff may feel uncomfortable speaking up about their concerns since these leaders are so nice and helpful. 'Caring' leaders may even come across as being somewhat of a perfectionist.

Empowering your people – too much

These leaders have complete trust and faith in their team. They know they are capable of great things and don't want to 'waste' their time by interrupting them with pointless meetings. They know that if their team has an issue they will raise it.

Sounds like a dream leader? Too much of this hands-off approach and the sense of empowerment becomes more like abdication or abandonment. We often want to help others fulfil their potential, but sometimes we move away too quickly. We forget our role is to provide the right amount of connection and guidance to keep our team motivated and to help them understand how their work contributes to the bigger purpose and mission of the business.

How to shift your good intentions to get the results you want

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being reliable, caring for your team and wanting to empower them. However, striking the right balance between good intentions and appropriate boundaries requires leaders to regularly reflect on their leadership and their ongoing communication with their team.

By shifting their focus from the kind of leader they want to be, to what kind of leader their people need, they will begin to create a highly engaged and productive team.

In Dan Pink's book Drive and TED talk, he focuses on three key elements of engaged staff and what helps them to be intrinsically motivated: Mastery, Autonomy and Purpose.

From Being Too Reliable to Encouraging Mastery. When leaders deliberately allow their team to make mistakes, fail and try again, they are providing them with the gift of learning and growth. Having personal mastery over a task, project or skill will continue to motivate their team and give them confidence to step out and try more things.

From Caring Too Much to Increasing Autonomy. Although these leaders want to see their team succeed, their team also need the ability to make their own decisions (within the boundaries the leader sets). Perhaps their boundaries need to be widened slightly to allow the team to set their own mini-goals and reach the agreed outcome in their unique way.

From Being Too Empowering to Reinforcing Purpose. Leaders who continually talk to their team about the bigger picture and a purpose larger than themselves do wonders for engagement and productivity. This ongoing dialogue and reinforcement help the team connect their personal goals to the wider business goals and mission.